My mother

Since my last post was September 2011 (gasp!) I feel like I need to take a step back before moving forward. My MOPS Convention was a much needed break to laugh, learn & love outside my little family. As a family we had already been dealing with some pretty drastic issues outside of the obvious- learning what it is to be a single parent home. My mom after years of other health problems, notably in 2010 suffering 8 strokes that affected her mentally, had a large stroke on May 17, 2011 that affected her physically. She spent a month in ICU, a month in rehab, a month in a nursing home and the rest of the year at home with frequent hospital stays. We had therapists in routinely and she showed signs of improvement. Until she just couldn't take it anymore.
My mom has always been a severely depressed person, missing many things from my middle school years on. I think her stroke hindered body got the best of her mentally. She faced one infection or set back continually. In December Hospice was called in. My dad kept reinforcing the idea that she could "graduate" from Hospice once she was improving again. She continued with her physical decline until suffering what we believe to have been another stroke shortly before she left the hospital on December 20th. The doctor had already discharged her that morning & when my dad got there at 2pm to arrange her transportation home, she didn't acknowledge him. She hadn't eaten or drank anything, nor had any pain meds that day. The nurse on duty was an idiot. Mom had long been past being able to hit a nurse call button, let alone ask for her medication, but apparently the nurse had not spent 30  seconds with her all day to know something was wrong. Her discharge papers were complete, they sent her home. She was unable to open her mouth to eat or drink. Per her wishes there would not be a feeding tube. For the next 10 days we sat bedside with her, talking to her, praying & mostly just sitting because she was still on this earth to sit with. Her last week our cousins from Alabama arrived & helped with a lot during their stay. One darling friend started bringing us meals on Thursday so I didn't have to worry about leaving her side to fix anything. On Friday, December 30, my cousins left that afternoon. A couple hours later we noticed a bad change to her breathing. My dad, brother, Josh & my oldest daughter, Leah all sat with her. The younger kids came down to say goodbye one last time. I had sent a message to my Aunt Jackie the day before that things were nearing the end. She called 30 minutes into our last vigil & I held the phone up so my mom could hear her voice one last time. About 15 minutes later.after 10 long days, she finally was at peace & let go.
My heart swelled knowing she was with Jesus. Thanks to our Hospice chaplain weeks prior, I know she was saved & was as right as she could be with God.
The biggest blessings these last months have given me was 1. A gradual loss, time to say goodbye & to love her as best I could knowing that her life was coming to an end. 2. Witnessing my dad. My dad has been ever faithful & loving- in ways he doesn't even realize. He believes that how he was with my mom was how everyone would be. Not everyone is so lucky. He visited her during every waking hour he wasn't working, sat by her bed, monitored her medicines & therapy appts. Then as things worsened prayed with her around the clock, changed diapers, cried if the slightest discomforted look crossed her face. I never heard a word of complaint. Which is a feat itself. My dad is a perpetual glass 1/2 empty kind of guy, nothing goes how you want it, no one will help you, etc...He complained about other things but never caring for my mom.
I saw a side to him that has touched me deeply & I'm so thankful to have seen a love like theirs.
Obituary for Jessica L. Dillion

Mike & Jessie
February 21, 1981

I know I will write plenty more about my mom in the future. I had 34 years with her (and only one year that we didn't speak- that's a story in itself).

I am deeply humbled by the love & support shown our family at this time. Many people that never met my mom, but still poured out love to us. Thank you to Pastor Shawn Edwards for performing the service & my Aunt Jackie who gave a beautiful eulogy, celebrating my mom & so much of their lives that they shared together.

I miss her, I missed her starting last May.But I know I will see her again. 

And as she signed everything,

<3

Me

Mom & Jackie when they got their high school class rings

My mom holding me. I love this. It's like the ultimate MOPS mom pic to me. And she's wearing a cool handkerchief, much better than the pointy snow suit I have on. 

Why I homeschool...still

It takes quite a bit for something to get under my skin and something has recently...people questioning my decision to home school my kids this year. Now the first thing I want to say is I really don't look for approval from everyone to do what I do. My concern is being in God's will and His will only. I'm good with that, I just wish everyone else- friends, family members (mainly one), people who barely know me, would leave me be after my basic brief explanation.

For most people the thought of home schooling scares them. I hear, "You are so brave", "I could never do that", "I can't wait to put my kids in school/summer to be over." Well, it's like most things in life- a leap of faith. One that I took 7 years ago after Leah finished 4th grade and public school wasn't the best fit for her abilities. Since then our reasons have matured  & changed along with our children, and when faced with the decision to home school after becoming a single parent, my reasons have shifted too. But I still know without a shadow of a doubt that this is what I'm supposed to be doing. Maybe that's why some of the well-meaning (and not so well-meaning) comments have gotten to me. I feel as though these few people are arguing with God and they just don't get it.

The biggest issue that I think many non-home schoolers don't realize is that it is a LIFESTYLE not just a school choice. Everything we do revolves around learning- sometimes the kids don't even realize it. Little Jon told a friend that stopped by last week that we don't home school anymore, "We just do lapbooks on cool stuff like knights & castles and our next one is on penguins" I taught my daughter to count by 5's and 10's the other night on a mile and a half walk. Learning is fun and I sincerely believe many public school children loose their initial love of learning after the first couple years. I want my kids to embrace their schooling, love to learn, think of what's around them and have the curiosity to know more.

My biggest critic that has killed me with kindness on this topic wonderfully pointed out that now that it's just me I should put the kids in school so I would be able to work all those hours. Said with a perfect smile as if that was the ultimate solution to all my problems. "Look, someone else deals with your kids & you make money." Even after I pointed out my serious issues with sending my kids to a public school this year she followed up with , "But they can do better" WHAT?

I guess I just needed to vent...I'm all for families with traditional school, I've been a part of it myself as well as one of my children for several years. And all this isn't to say that next year will be different for us. But if this is what I've decided for mine, why argue or make me feel bad?

MOPS Convention 2011

The excitement has reached the point of being practically unbearable! 3 days after today I will be heading to  Nashville to learn, meet & worship with thousands of other MOPS moms for 4 solid days. There's a lot more going into this year's Convention for me, since I am now a Field Leader. I am really looking forward to meeting  some of my groups' Steering Teams on Thursday night. I am gathering full size care products for a give away to a local ministry, used shoes for Compassion, goody bags for my TeenMOPS team going, organizing my FL binder in preparation to stuffing it full of new, useful info, packing my own bags, organizing activities for my kids here at home, bills while I'm gone, the list goes on and on, and on...
The one thing I am looking forward to the most is our General Session time. There is nothing like being in a room with 4000+ women singing for the glory of God! I got a taste of this 2 weeks ago at my Thirty-One Conference and I can't believe the difference it has made in my life since. This has probably been the hardest year of my life (7 months ago yesterday, as a matter of fact) and I've survived. And it's not all been bad, and I've been brought closer to my God in more ways than I can explain, but I've also felt this distance that I can only accredit to my faith. I've been relying on the faith I've ALREADY had, not infusing my faith with the rejoicing of a new morning every morning with Christ. Maybe it's a lot to put on my time at Convention, but I sincerely believe that God is going to show up and show up BIG! And I'm praying and waiting and practically shaking with the anticipation for it.
Next on my Convention "looking forward to" list is the workshop with Jen Hatmaker. Since last year's workshop, "Even Mary lost Jesus" I've been an avid Jen fan, following her on Facebook, and now her blog. In addition to reading several of her books. Honestly my copy of "Out of the Spin Cycle" is so dog-eared and written in it is now to the point of being utterly pathetic and unworthy of being called a "book". I've been following her life saga of adopting 2 children from Ethiopia and can't wait to hear her again in  person & rejoice in the fact that God is working in her life.
I've been to several MOPS Conventions- starting with my first in Grapevine, TX. I went alone. It was scary- my first time flying alone, first time to navigate an airport alone, first time checking in hotels alone, etc. But the best thing about that trip was (and forgive me, MOPS Int.) was the church I attended Sunday morning before I left for the airport. It was a cowboy church in a local restaurant in one of the out lying sites of the Grapevine Mall. That service changed my perspective of "church" and moved me in so many ways! And prepared me to serve a distinct place in the future of my home church, Hebron Baptist.

A night on the town with Elvis!

I've been to Nashville before too. The following year I attended with several of our Steering Team members and the bonding of that time is still unprecedented! Here I met my first TeenMOPS moms & Coordinators. The information & friendships I gleaned from these chance meetings has been priceless in my quest to start/coordinate our own group.

Me & Julie Barnhill, One Tough Mother

Me & Karen, not the GPS Karen at Planet Hollywood

Last year I attended Convention in Orlando. Just getting there was an epic journey of 16 hours straight driving with our handy dandy GPS "Karen" and my right hand mom friend, Karen. After I was there I attended my first TeenMOPS Positional workshop and was able to get the basis and outline for our group that started this past September. I love the ladies that went on that trip and so excited to see that many of the "regular" moms in that 8 passenger Suburban are now looking at leadership for this upcoming MOPS year! Glory to God for the work in their lives serving this ministry!

All but 1 will be Steering this year &  she graduated!

So with this year's Convention days away, I have no idea of the surprises and chance encounters God has in store for me as Field Leader and TeenMOPS Coordinator, but I do know it will be memorable!

Oh, how I miss my blog!

So much has happened in the last couple weeks- Trinnie has gotten 3 stitches (Happy Birthday to Me!) and had them removed. Jon's Cub Scouts camped out at Florence Freedom's field, his pack's Harry Potter themed camp-out~ on back to back nights! I attended Thirty-One's National Conference in Columbus, Ohio for 2 amazing nights. I'm feeling much better- refreshed with ideas for my business, and feeling like a clearer version of myself after many months of a fog like state. Leah went to Cumberland College for a mission trip with church and worked on the final stages in rehabbing the football facilities at Jellico High School. She came back a nicer version of herself too.  And on July 17th, we lost a sweet little boy here on earth. Gabe, one of the little guys of a teen mom drowned in his family's back yard pool. He was 2 and he's with Jesus. Very hard week, folks, very hard. And as silly as it sounds, rejoicing over the fact that my favorite author, Jen Hatmaker,  made it home with the first of 2 Ethiopians joining the Hatmaker family. God is good. All the time.
Now I'm getting geared up and into the final madness of preparing for MOPS Convention in Nashville, starting next Wednesday. I will be leaving my kids for 5 days with instructions for them not to kill or maim each other, when their grandma & various friends will be picking up all or some of them, medical releases, &  A LOT of prayer. They will be fine & so will I. Trinnie will be turning 6 while I'm gone and we will be celebrating the following weekend with a "When you give a pig a pancake" Piggy Party.
Then before we know it school will be here! Leah's senior year is done creeping and is now a freight train barreling at us with it's lights right in our faces. Can you tell I'm feeling uncertain in this area? Well, pray for me, friends- I'm teaching Psychology for 9//10th graders and a second AP Psych to 11/12 graders. It'll be the first time for something this big, this important, this so-not-at-our-home teaching I've done. I'm excited for sure, but don't be surprised if I start sleep-blogging stray psychology terms or start layman diagnosing everyone with severe problems.
I plan on adding pictures and writing up a little more about each of the main things I mentioned but I needed to write, even briefly, about all the things running through my head. A glorified list being called a post, if you like.

A rough 24 hours for Jon...

As Jon slept by the computer last night, he rolled over on his gum that he took out of his mouth and it got in his hair. I had to cut it out with the plans for a nice close haircut today. Here's hoping someplace is open!

The solution turned out to be Uncle Josh & his clippers.

Stylin' with his new ultra short mohawk! 

And here's a better picture just 'cause I love it so much. That's his cousin Mary with the bunny ears.

OOPS! Really, I didn't mean to!

I finally did it! After 4 years of having 4 kids going in 4 different directions, I did it. I left a child somewhere. Tonight was actually pretty calm, I've always pictured this happening when I'm going crazy with a 100 things but nope, no excuse!
The 3 little ones went to a VBS this week and tonight was their final night complete with slip-n-slide & dinner. Leah had a party at a friend's house so I actually ended up with 2 full hours to myself after making the drop-off rounds. I treated myself to a Jimmy John's Italian Nightclub sandwich and headed over to HealthSouth to visit with my mom. Dad filled me in today-they are releasing her to Villa Springs Nursing Home next Tuesday. Villa Spring is supposed to have an excellent physical therapy program so I'm happy this is working out for her. After an hour with my mom and getting her settled in bed for the evening I left and with time on my hands stopped at Micheal's for some crafting items. I'm craving crafts worse than chocolate these days. There will be a new post tomorrow! Well, Micheal's has a time warp machine instead of automatic doors so I lost track of time and showed up to pick the little ones up from VBS at 9:02 after every other parent had left. We stopped on the way home for gas & to drop library books off, then I had them change into their pajamas and we took off to see fireworks across from the Florence Freedom stadium. They were spectacular! As soon as the fireworks ended we headed to pick up Leah at her friend's house. No sooner than she gets in the car than Jon declares, "I need to go to the bathroom". So we pull into UDF in Hebron where Leah & Jon both go in. I, of course, end up lost in the world of my phone, checking in on FourSquare & Facebook. So Leah comes out and I put my phone down, back up, then hear, "MOOOOOooooommm!!!!" And Jon is hopping off the sidewalk after bursting through the doors of UDF. At his yell the 3 other people in the parking lot look up, realize what is going on and are laughing so hard we can hear them in the van with the windows up. I think I broke his heart. After many apologies, we made it home for the night where he promptly crashed by the computer where he wouldn't be out of my sight- he knows me so well.

After going to bed last night myself, I remembered going to a seminar by Jen Hatmaker last MOPS Convention titled, "Even Mary lost Jesus" and fully expected it to be a mom moment kinda class. Needless to say (especially remembering it through the blur that Convention often produces) it wan't that at all. It was about losing Jesus as the focus of our lives and even our ministries. I've certainly felt that way lately. I KNOW Jesus hasn't left me, but I haven't felt like talking to him, just kinda nodding my head at him when I catch a glimpse of him now & then. Last night, seeing Jon running out to me brought that whole seminar back to me in a flash. Jesus has been running at me too and I think now I'm finally ready to let him get back in the van too- the driver's seat- not the 3rd row where he's been patiently waiting and watching over us from. I think leaving Jon (for the 3.5 seconds I was backing up) may have been the best thing for all of us.

Fatherless Father's Day

This ride we're on is full of ups and downs and even today is no exception. For Father's Day I was bombarded last week by my mother-in-law asking if there was anything the kids wanted to pass along to Jon for Father's Day. I told her that I wasn't bringing it up and upsetting them just to give him a message. They would have been completely clueless if I hadn't gone to church this morning. Of course everything there centered around Father's Day. Add 3 kids who haven't seen their father in almost 6 months and it's all headed for disaster. I will spare everyone the details.
After church Leah headed to Kings Island on a special cheap day as a guest with Cornerstone's youth group. The little ones and I headed to the Chinese Mall for a special lunch then I surprised them with taking them to see Kung Fu Panda 2. Again, not the best choice for today. Po struggles through the movie with his family and his adopted dad. It ends with him coming home to hug the daddy goose. Really wish I had known...

The bright spots of the day is we got Jon a pair of water proof hiking boots in preparation for Day camp this week. And something that can't go with out mentioning... the blessing of today...the music minister at Cornerstone, Jeff, had a "small' stroke this week. He was at church leading worship today. He sang a song about praising God. Beautiful, heart wrenching & moving coming from him. I know I will take the rest of today and every Father's Day praying for my kids hearts and showing them as best I can that their Heavenly Father is always there for them, even when human fathers (and on bad days, mothers) fail. I'm not perfect, but so thankful for the love of One who is.

I Really Don't Want to Do This!

These past few weeks have been so hard. EVERYTHING is in limbo...our housing, jobs, things at church. Then there is the behavioral stuff...mine, Jonah's, Jon's (which seems to have settled somewhat), Leah, even Trinity.
And if that's not enough- add my mom. The good news today was that over the weekend she had improved enough to go to rehab versus a nursing home. Looks like she will be moved to Gateway today.
Really it just makes for a very angry mommy. Everything makes me mad. I feel like I could sleep for weeks. I want the house clean, I want closure on this house, I want the fleas to miraculously jump off the cats, 2 of them to find a home somewhere else and while that miracle is being worked I want some type of consistent income  that doesn't have me away from the kids 40+ hours a week that we can live off of. I can't stand to be around them right now and can't bear to be separated. I think all this is summed up in "I NEED A BREAK!"
But I need to come up with $1200 for the attorney, need to get the blue van sold, need to seriously find a way to de-flea 4 cats that I can't let outside because of the neighbors or in the house with the fleas, the house packed, the Realtor needs paperwork, totally clean the boys' room, find another place to live, brakes for the van, parent the kids, mess up the kids, fix the kids, deal with the food card & medical card issues for Jonah, Leah's braces, her license, a vehicle, her working, senior year, and now a serious day in my life moment- the belly button ring! ...AAAAAHHHHH!!!!

I just needed to vent...thank you.
   

Our Renaissance Adventure

Studying knights & castles has definitely been interesting. I decided to take the kids to the Kentucky Renaissance Festival on June 11th, when I could get Jon in free, along with Trinnie & Jonah, by bringing a canned good. We loaded up the van- see how much Thirty-One I use?

We headed to a campground one exit up from LaGrange and only a few miles from the Festival. It was gorgeous there. Alot of the campground was taken up with people who lived there all the time- or at least enough they felt the need to build decks around their RV's. We were in a tent, that will be important in just a minute. Here's the view from our spot by the lake. Breath taking isn't it?

It was a beautiful evening until about midnight when the wind picked up. Enough to wake me up, which says quite a bit when I have 3 sleeping babies and they aren't moving a muscle. Thank goodness for weather apps! We were in for gusts up to 40 mph and scattered thunderstorms. Well, the wind continued through the night so severely that I had to get up several times to re-stake the tent. That's pretty drastic considering all that we had in there and I had moved most of it around the corners to keep it weighted. All the time the wind is going it's also lightening- no rain, just spectacular lightening. And thunder, which the kids continued to sleep through. Jon is normally afraid of storms so his undisturbed rest is still a mystery to me! Along about 5am I woke up, not even realizing I dozed off. It was calm. Not in good way. I got a bad feeling and decided to act on it. Now have I mentioned that Leah was being a total turd and had slept in the van? Well, she got a rude awakening when I jumped in and started it. I pulled it as close to the tent as I could per Trinnie's suggestion. She had woken up just a few seconds after I did. Once the van was in position I woke the boys and had all 3 make a jump into the van. The heavens burst and the rain just poured! The wind picked up again and the tent started flapping like crazy- I never even stopped- I just started emptying the tent, throwing things like crazy into the van. I figured if it blew away it wasn't taking any of my stuff! Blankets and all were shoved and piled on kids. In about 60 seconds I was done, van doors shut and we sat for the next hour watching the sheets of rain pound the windshield and rock the van. After the storm finally blew over we made a restroom break then headed to McD's- someplace dry and didn't require a camp fire with wet wood.
After breakfast we made it back to the campground, showered and prepared for our day at the festival. It was sunny & beautiful! We browsed the shops, saw a couple shows and the best part~ the jousting! See more...

Driving into a new season...

At the beginning of April I packed up the kids and headed south. It was short notice, but I think it was the best thing I could've have done for us at the time. I look at the kids every day, even the really bad mommy days and think to myself, "I am so blessed to have these guys and watch them grow-up." I really feel like the trip was a way to surround myself with them constantly, out of our normal run-like-crazy days, just to be connected to the closest family we have left. One thing I thought on the way down was the further south we went the greener and prettier it became- like driving into a different season. The South has always been "home" in a way that I can't explain. My summers with my grandparents visiting family are my best memories. For this reason the sight of red dirt brings an almost painful rush of joy and tears to my eyes, knowing that my time south is precious.
This trip it was even more special...my first visit to Mississippi to see Jenny & her kids. Jenny is an absolute blessing to me and has been  for several years (really, that long already?)  and it was my first excursion down her way. And the added bonus was a visit with Denise & Keith, my second cousins one evening and a trip to the city cemetery to look up family markers.
Mississippi was nothing like I expected. I think I read too much...but as we crossed an unmarked state line (the only difference being the change in pavement, which was not for the better), I was pleasantly surprised by the lush green views that were rolling past the back roads we traveled on. Trees were in full bloom, some crops already planted and rural enough for everyone out to nod, tip their head or wave to us. We spent 2 wonderful afternoons playing at parks & a nature reserve, just letting the kids run. Jenny and I didn't get to talk any more than we do on a typical "Monday" night phone call, but it was enough to be in her calming presence for several hours.
We attempted, ahem, drove back toward Moulton to visit with Denise & Keith on Wednesday night and after an eventful 1 hour detour thanks to my phone's lacking GPS abilities in rural Alabama, made it in time for some delicious take-out BBQ. We all enjoyed hanging out at Denise's with them, just her sweet southern drawl makes me feel at home. And we brought home more canned pears from Keith and cucumbers pickled with red hots candy. We tried to take an alternate route home so we wouldn't be on the darkest of roads, but alas it was just not going our way. After our second serious detour of the night, we arrived back in Columbus, MS at our hotel at 4am. My only regret is not being able to see Jenny again before leaving the following morning. Lesson learned: Stay in Moulton with Denise for a few days straight, then closer to Jenny for a few days straight. No driving back and forth=more time with loved ones!
On our way home watching the season change slowly back from a lush, early Alabama summer to a dreary, not-quite spring of Kentucky I was thinking how my life has switched from one season to another and the timing of everything going on.
In more ways than one I can not wait for my summer to arrive! If it takes too long I may just pack up and drive until the red dirt starts creeping at the edges of the asphalt. God's timing it will be, but it was nice to see the glimpse of different season in myself and the reassurance of those that love me unconditionally.

A little explanation

I thought I would take this sleepless night before our March MOPS meeting to explain the title of my blog.
This name came to me several weeks ago which of course followed a night that my kids had cookies for dinner. It just shows how far we've let ourselves go, how far we've come and the grace that covers us all.
Which I know what you're thinking, "I get it shows how far you've let yourself go, but the rest?" Well let me explain...

Since what I think of as "The Big Change" we've had the luxury of eating healthier. We lost a picky eater (among other things I could call him) so our grocery shopping has revolved more around fresh fruits, health drinks & healthier snacks. The deep fryer has been banished to the garage, replaced by my new friend Coffeemaker, and for the most part we've done well in our healthier lifestyle changes. Though we have some indulgences, mainly in the form of little circular bits of happiness- the cookie.

For the most part I've been able to count my blessings and getting through day by day, prayer by prayer, but one particular day I felt so bad- in a nameless "It's just a nasty do nothing day" way that I completely spaced on food. The kids probably wish for more of these kinds of days even if I'd be happy to never see one again.
They had cereal for breakfast, string cheese (that's somewhat healthy, right?) yogurt tubes, and whatever else they could scavenge off the counters & top of the fridge. Around bedtime I realized they had all gotten into the Oreos and that was about the same time I realized they were just going to bed with that as their supper.


And the part about grace? Though it wasn't the best option for dinner that night God knows I needed that day to recharge. I think of this verse from Lamentations 3:22-23. The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

Boys Stand Up to Pee

    When I found out I was pregnant with Leah, I prayed and prayed that I would have a girl. I just didn't feel capable to raise a boy on my own. One of the happiest days  in my life was seeing that ultrasound and knowing I was having a little girl and that she didn't have a cleft palate. Fast forward almost 16 years and here I am a single mom, not only to my precious Leah, but also to Trinity & of course the two boys- Jon & Jonah.
    The other day I was sitting at the computer desk in our front room and hear what was obviously more than one child in the bathroom around the corner. I was about to yell my usual, "One in the bathroom at a time!", when Jon's voice says, "You know you can stand up to pee, right, Jojo?" Knowing this was going to be good, I just listened. Jon continued to tell Jonah how to pull his pants down, where to stand, where to aim (which scares me a little), how to shake & flush. I was impressed, especially since Jon typically isn't the most helpful child in the universe. Jonah has now mastered the peeing standing up process, within 2 months of potty training. I've had to clean the bathroom much more frequently these past few days, but as a mom knowing how the mess came to be, I don't mind. I'm proud of my boys this week and thank God that He gave Jonah a "man" to teach him this ultimate passage into boyhood, even if it was his 7 year old brother. 

Surviving as a Single Mom

To say the least we are on a new adventure, one that has us from tops of mountains to the bottoms of some serious valleys. In the 2 short months we've been on this adventure we've been able to see God work in some miraculous ways. I've lost count of all of them. I really want to write as much as I can so I can look back on this, one of the most difficult times in my life and remember the blessings, and for the kids to one day be able to see the incredible journey we traveled together. One reason I've chosen to do this as a blog, versus a private journal is I've been lucky enough to SEE how God equipped me to handle this, the people He placed in our lives to walk beside us, and if I can come along side one other mom either now or in the future to God be the glory.
Let's get started...